Chinese Gift-Giving Taboos: What Not to Give

Giving gifts is a wonderful way to express appreciation, gratitude, or affection. However, in Chinese culture, certain items are considered inappropriate as gifts. Some taboos stem from double meanings, while others arise from symbolic associations. To avoid accidentally offending a friend, take note of these key gift-giving taboos.

1. Fans (扇) and Umbrellas (伞)

Fans, or shàn, and umbrellas, or sǎn, should not be given as gifts. They seem practical, but their pronunciation closely resembles the word sǎn/sàn (散), which means to scatter or separate. Giving a fan or umbrella to someone can symbolize a desire to break a good relationship or drive someone away. Therefore, giving these to a new friend may not be the best idea. A similar sentiment applies to sharp objects like knives and scissors—not because of wordplay, but because a sharp object is thought to “cut” a relationship short.

2. Clocks (钟)

There is a Chinese phrase, sòng zhōng (送终), which refers to paying one’s last respects to a deceased family member or loved one after burial or cremation. Unfortunately, the Chinese for gifting a clock, 送 (give) 钟 (clock), is pronounced exactly the same. Clocks, especially when given to older people, are thus seen as bad luck heralding death, also symbolizing that someone is “running out of time.” They should not be given, unless the clock or watch is of a particularly expensive brand or a luxury product very clearly intended as a gift—most of the time it is best to avoid giving these kinds of gifts altogether.

3. Pears (梨)

Another instance of wordplay involves pears. Fruits are often excellent gifts, but one that should not be given is the pear, as the word for pear, lí (梨), is pronounced the same as 离 (to leave or part)—not the best message for a relationship. On the other hand, other fruits like apples and tangerines are great choices—many fruits fit into positive Chinese blessings and can bring good luck, just remember not to use this one!

4. Shoes (鞋)

If you haven’t caught on by now, many gift taboos result from wordplay leading to bad luck. The same is true of shoes, pronounced xié (鞋)—the same as 邪, or evil, in Chinese. This isn’t the strictest taboo, but it can be a sign of bad luck, so you may be better off gifting a different article of clothing or an accessory—try a purse or a nice coat instead.

5. Flowers (花)

Obviously not all flowers are forbidden gifts! Cut flowers are often used for funerals, though, and it’s best not to give certain flowers as gifts. Chrysanthemums, for example, are usually associated with death, so giving them to old or sick people is usually not a great idea. White flowers are often used in funerals as well, since white is a color typically associated with death and mourning (similar to black in Western culture), so an all-white bouquet can be a little strange to give to a friend who is still alive and well. Plum blossoms, gladiolus flowers, and jasmine are other examples of flowers that might not work out due to word rhymes, but not as bad as chrysanthemums or a bunch of white flowers. Roses, peonies, and camellias are far more popular as gifts.

6. Four (四)

Lastly, try not to give things in groups of four! Four, or sì (四), rhymes with the word for death, sǐ (死), and is usually seen as a number of bad luck. Instead, try giving things in groups of six or eight, both of which are seen as the luckiest numbers, indicating wealth and good fortune (very popular motifs in Chinese culture, if you haven’t noticed by now).

Hopefully these tips are helpful for your next gift-giving occasion! Some of these taboos aren’t too serious, and if you’re from a background where you wouldn’t have known these taboos growing up, most people will be pretty forgiving, so don’t beat yourself up about giving something that might have been bad luck to a Chinese friend in the past. In the end, gifts are just a show of good will, and it’s the thought that counts!